Relapse Workshop: Learning Self- Forgiveness After Relapse
Estimated watch time: 4 mins
Summary:
Everyone makes mistakes. If you’re in recovery, a relapse may be one of those. Relapses are incredibly common, but you can’t get stuck in a cycle of anger at yourself.
This guide walks you through how to learn self-forgiveness and put it into practice so you can move forward.
Video Materials:
Other Videos in Series:
u003colu003ern tu003cliu003eu003ca href=u0022https://www.therecoveryvillage.com/resources/videos/learning-from-relapse/u0022u003eRelapse as a Learning Opportunityu003c/au003eu003c/liu003ern tu003cliu003eu003ca href=u0022https://www.therecoveryvillage.com/resources/videos/self-forgiveness-after-relapse/u0022u003eLearning Self- Forgiveness After Relapseu003c/au003eu003c/liu003ern tu003cliu003eu003ca href=u0022https://www.therecoveryvillage.com/resources/videos/relapse-warnings-signs/u0022u003eWarnings Signs of a Relapseu003c/au003eu003c/liu003ern tu003cliu003eu003ca href=u0022https://www.therecoveryvillage.com/resources/videos/reducing-relapse-risks/u0022u003eHow to Reduce Relapse Risksu003c/au003eu003c/liu003ern tu003cliu003eu003ca href=u0022https://www.therecoveryvillage.com/resources/videos/addictive-behaviors/u0022u003eUnderstanding Addictive Behaviorsu003c/au003eu003c/liu003ern tu003cliu003eu003ca href=u0022https://www.therecoveryvillage.com/resources/videos/relapse-action-plan/u0022u003eHow to Make an Action Plan for Risky Situationsu003c/au003eu003c/liu003ern tu003cliu003eu003ca href=u0022https://www.therecoveryvillage.com/resources/videos/coping-stress/u0022u003eHow to Identify u0026amp; Cope with Stressorsu003c/au003eu003c/liu003ern tu003cliu003eu003ca href=u0022https://www.therecoveryvillage.com/resources/videos/lifestyle-changes-for-recovery/u0022u003eLifestyle Changes for a Healthy Recoveryu003c/au003eu003c/liu003ern tu003cliu003eu003ca href=u0022https://www.therecoveryvillage.com/resources/videos/balanced-living/u0022u003eHow to Live a More Balanced Lifeu003c/au003eu003c/liu003ernu003c/olu003e
Related Content:
u003ch5u003eAccompanying Worksheets:u003c/h5u003ernThere are lessons accompanying each video that you can u003ca href=u0022https://recovery.force.com/app/s/login/?ec=302u0026amp;startURL=%2Fapp%2Fs%2Fu0022 target=u0022_blanku0022 rel=u0022noopener external nofollowu0022u003eaccess through our recovery portal, Swellu003c/au003e or you can download, u003ca href=u0022https://www.therecoveryvillage.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/11/Online-Relapse-Program-Worksheets_compressed.pdfu0022u003ehereu003c/au003e. (Lesson 2)rnu003ch5u003eu003cstrongu003eMedically-reviewed articles:u003c/strongu003eu003c/h5u003ernu003culu003ern tu003cliu003eu003ca href=u0022https://www.therecoveryvillage.com/drug-addiction/relapse/#Common_Relapse_Triggersu0022u003eCommon Relapse Triggersu003c/au003eu003c/liu003ern tu003cliu003eu003ca href=u0022https://www.therecoveryvillage.com/recovery/relapse/help-someone-experiencing-relapse/u0022u003eHow to Help Someone Who is Experiencing a Relapseu003c/au003eu003c/liu003ernu003c/ulu003ernu003ch5u003eu003cstrongu003eProfessional webinars:u003c/strongu003eu003c/h5u003ernu003culu003ern tu003cliu003eu003ca href=u0022https://www.therecoveryvillage.com/professionals/webinars/relapse-prevention-changing-world/u0022u003eRelapse Prevention: “Doing” Recovery in this Changing Worldu003c/au003eu003c/liu003ern tu003cliu003eu003ca href=u0022https://www.therecoveryvillage.com/professionals/webinars/advanced-recovery-systems-recovery-panel/u0022u003eOur Staff’s Stories of Recoveryu003c/au003eu003c/liu003ernu003c/ulu003e
Transcript:
u003ch3u003eRelapse Workshop: Self Forgivenessu003c/h3u003ernu003cemu003eThis lesson is about self forgiveness for your relapse.u003c/emu003ernrnWhen you’ve used drugs or alcohol for a long time to cope with painful emotions or stress, it can be extremely difficult to let go of that strategy.rnrnRelapsing is really just a return to an ineffective coping strategy. So labeling yourself a failure from making a mistake can make it very hard for you to get back on track. It keeps you in a self-perpetuating place where you just keep relapsing because you’re making yourself feel bad.rnrnIf you can treat relapse as a learning opportunity, you can make your recovery program stronger.rnrnThere are people who will judge you and make unfair assumptions about your character because of your addictive use. There is also a stigma you feel because you assume people are judging you when they may not be. There is also self-stigma when you have negative feelings about yourself because you’re addicted.rnrnFocusing on internal and external stigma can lead to feelings of low self-esteem and shame, these feelings of shame can make it very difficult to return to recovery. Shame needs understanding, empathy and compassion in order to heal. So when these feelings come up for you, talking about these feelings with a therapist, a friend or a family member who can be compassionate is what’s going to be most helpful for you.rnrnIt’s natural to feel guilty, ashamed or embarrassed after a relapse. Acknowledging what happened, apologizing for anything negative that happened as a result, and recommitting to recovery are the best ways to ensure that guilt and shame don’t linger.rnrnYou don’t need to beat yourself up. It only prolongs the painful emotions that can trigger further use. Encouraging yourself to behave differently going forward will result in a more positive effect on your actions.rnrnYou are the product of your conditioning, your genetics, your environment and your culture. Recognizing that you’re operating from a framework of various factors can help you see that your supposed shortcomings don’t make you inherently worse than anybody else. Your struggles are a part of what makes you human. And everybody has struggles.rnrnWithout self-forgiveness, your shame can lead you to get defensive, make excuses for lapsing, or blame others for your behaviors. Acknowledging your faults without getting defensive allows you to use criticism and corrective feedback to help you improve. Self-forgiveness shows that you’re willing to forgive others, too. You are demonstrating that it’s OK to be human and to make mistakes.rnrnSo in the exercise after this lesson, you can fill in the information that will help you with self-forgiveness.rnrnWhat mistakes are the hardest for you to forgive yourself? What beliefs, past messages, thoughts, or feelings make it hard to forgive yourself for the mistakes you’ve listed? What beliefs, experiences or feelings have taught you that you are expected to be good all the time to be perfect and not make mistakes?rnrnHave you ever put unrealistic expectations on yourself or other people? Has someone ever put unrealistic expectations on you? To whom do you owe an apology for the mistakes that you’ve made?rnrnAnd what will you do differently going forward? To show that you’re earning forgiveness for your actions?rnrnu003cstrongu003eIn lesson three, we’re going to talk about the warning signs of a relapse.u003c/strongu003ernrnThank you for choosing The Recovery Village. If you or a loved one are struggling with mental health or substance abuse and would like to find out more about the programs we offer, please reach out to us directly at u003ca href=u0022tel:855-387-3291u0022u003e855-387-3291u003c/au003e.
Other Addiction & Mental Health Resources
The Recovery Village has several, free resources for those living with addiction or mental health conditions and their loved ones. From videos, to clinically-hosted webinars and recovery meetings, to helpful, medically-reviewed articles, there is something for everyone. If you need more direct help, please reach out to one of our representatives.